Monday, September 8, 2014

Random Stuff OR I'm Just Going to Blog Whatever

I'm polishing up Deadsville.  It's at the formatters and I have to fix stuff before it gets epublished, which happens.  In the meantime people keep asking and I'm all like, "Soon.  Soon.  Soon."  It's not that I mind people asking.  (I don't.)  It's just that it's a little frustrating for me because this part is out of my hands.  I would rather be all super uber controlling.  Anyway, soon.  Soon.  Soon.  Here's the teaser cover.
She reminds me of Kay Lenz from the 70s.  Who remembers
Kay Lenz?  I think she was most famous for being married to
David Cassidy for a few years.  I was totally
jealous because I thought David Cassidy was hot
stuff.  Shaun was pretty hot, too, but I don't
remember who he married.  Oh those preteen
hormones.
In other cat news, the new cat is all like "Pet me, pet me, pet me."  The old cat is like, "Why are you petting him, bee-yotch?  Now I have to eff him up."  Then the moron jumps on the cat with no name.  The cat with no name (who does have a name but it doesn't sound as cool as the cat with no name) decides he's had enough of the moron cat and swats him upside the head.  The moron cat decides his manhood has been insulted and jumps on the other cat again.  Hissing and yowling commence until they've had enough.  Usually the breakaway collar of the cat with no name is the only casualty.  Feline melodrama.

The cat with no name likes his food, I'll tell you that.  We've never owned a "fat" cat before.  The vet told us we need to put him on a kitty diet.  He weighs 15 pounds and he's supposed to be around 12.  (I haven't told the cat yet.)  When I get up at 3 am to pee because my beloved daughter broke my bladder when I was pregnant, the cat with no name assumes I'm getting up to feed him, because what else would humans be doing at 3 am?
It's a Westside Story thing.
He mmrrrrs at me, follows me into the bathroom, and I just adore (not) being watched while I take care of business, then he tries to trip me while he leads me out the bedroom door and down the stairs.  (If he can lead me downstairs I will go into the magical place where there is FOOD, and it will be dispensed unto the cat with no name who turns into Hoover Cat.)  Instead I go straight and climb back into bed.  Then the moron cat gets up to straighten out the cat with no name and more melodrama ensues.  This is concluded by me finding ear plugs to put in so I can go back to sleep for an hour or two.
I figure this is what is happening when I can't see.  I can hear it, though
even with ear plugs.
Let's see.  It's hot and humid in Alabama.  That sounds like the name of a bad country song.  I'm going to melt if I have to put up with this much longer.  I don't even think the cats like it that much.  They come in from the enclosed porch with their little ears back.  The moron cat is clearly pissed at the cat with no name for the high humidity and blames him accordingly.  ("You did this, asshamster.  I'll eff you up again.")  But the cat with no name weighs more than the moron cat.  (That weight is good for something.)  So it ends up being an acrimonious draw.
I know it doesn't really fit with hot and humid, but I liked how the cat
was ninjaing the dog.
Finally I have started writing Bubba 6 or otherwise known as Bubba and the Ten Little Loonies unless I come up with a better name.  But then I figure who else could I insult?  Say this out loud, "I yam sew wee todd did.  I yam sofa king wee todd did."  Say it faster.  There, I've probably insulted everyone else that I previously missed.  (I did that to my father-in-law once but it wasn't funny because he never got the joke.)

I read a recent review of Bubba and the Zigzaggery Zombies in which the reviewer complained that I had too much political commentary in it.  I might have to go back and re-read it again because as I recall I pretty much dun both dems and repubs equally.  I might have dinged the tea party, too.

Okay, I'm out of cute memes, so I'll leave you.




1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Love the stories about the cats. Can't wait for the new bubba book. It will be out next week right? LOL

Now available: Bubba and the Late Lamented Lassie What could possibly go wrong? Bubba Snoddy is a good ol’ boy with a wonderful family.  H...