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Monday, August 20, 2012

Got Dem Sunday Blues OR What to Blog, What to Blog, What to Blog?

The Bevill fam went to see Paranorman, which was pretty good, but also we got to see previews for Frankenwienie and The Hobbit, which kicks butt on the big screen.  Peter Jackson, I would bear your children for you, if I weren't nearly fifty, fat, already married, and didn't have a sense of humor.  Recently I was conversing with someone about the preview for The Hobbit, which doesn't come out until December.  (Peter, I take back what I said, seriously.  You released a preview almost a year ahead of time to taunt and tease us.  You shameless hussy.  December effing 14th, for the love of merciful Pete.)  This person hadn't seen the preview yet and I said, "When they start to sing, it gives me goosebumps."  Of course, I believe the person thought I was insane because it's an odd thing to say.  (Yes saying "When they start to sing, it gives me goosebumps," is a weird thing to say no matter where you're hanging out at or how many Screaming Red Zombies you've consumed.)  But all of you Baby Boomers with the four Tolkien books gathering dust in the attic, you've seen the preview and you know what I'm talking about.  (You do!  Admit it!  You know.  You're one of us.  You've come over to the Baby Boomer side.)  So here's the preview for the two of you left who haven't seen it yet:

Cate Blanchett don't look 43, I'll tell you what.  I need pointy ears.  Wait, I'll do an illustration for effect.  (Why?  Why the hell not?  It's my blog and I'm feeling frisky.)
This train of thought brings up several points.  I look more like a Vulcan than an elf.  (I can't do the finger splitting thing at all.  My fingers don't do that.)  Then I need to make sure Galadriel was really an elf or if my memory is all messed up.  (That's always possible.  In fact, it might even be probable.)  (Yep, people put anything on Wikipedia.  Seriously.  Anything.  See here.  It's got the character's biography, history, personal likes and dislikes, and whether she likes to dance nekkid in the rain after drinking pina colodas.  Well, maybe not that much information.)

(Who has three initials before their last name?  Really?  J. R. R. Tolkien?  Why not J. R. R. R. Tolkien?  Uh-oh, I may have offended the die hard Tolkieniens.  Sorry.  All in Fat Woman fun.)

Our daughter, Cressy, watched The Hobbit preview, with interest.  I don't think she was into that much but she giggled when the Gollum started in with "My precious," at the end of the preview.  She leaned over to me and said, "He's got a funny voice, Mama."  This was followed by a titter.  I'm pretty sure Cressy won't won't to sit through a nearly three hour movie no matter how funky the Gollum's voice is.

Which leads me to this realization which I noted when I looked at how to spell Cate Blanchett's name correctly in

It's pro/con news depending on how folks view it.  For me, it's con.  I do not like it.  It's Hollywood trying to gouge us and I feel used.  (Kind of like how everyone feels after the November election.  I'm sure you can relate.  "They made promises.  They MADE promises.  I feel like I have to go take a shower.")  Okay, brace yourselves, middle aged nerds on the edge of your seats in the basement...

The Hobbit will be in...three parts.  THREE FRIGGING PARTS!

Oh, Peter.  Peter.  Peter.  I'm sending email to your mama about your behavior.  (For those of you who haven't figured this dilemma out, that means we have to wait three years to see all three parts.  Three years.  Peter Jackson has obviously been talking with George Lucas.  Those bastards.)
Three parts?  Really?  Seriously?  Really?  Come on!  Are they all going to be in 3D?  Do we have to take out a mortgage to see them?  I must stop blogging to scream nonsensically out of the door and alarm the neighbors.  (They need to get used to it.)

Anyway, I'm counting the days down until December 14th.  Who's in?


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Anonymous said...

This should appeal to your sense of humor.
I heard an interview with the man (name forgotten) who does the voice of Golum. He was asked how he came up with that sound. He said that one day his wife's(?) cat was throwing up a hairball and making this terrible sound. I think he described it as something between a hiss and a gargle. That was his inspiration. Worked for me.

Carwoo said...

Bwahaha. I got my inspiration from a cat throwing up a hairball. That's too funny. And yes, that hits my funny bone. Thanks, Mitch.

Anonymous said...

I got goosebumps too. And yes I'm in to see it, and yes Peter is a bad, bad boy for breaking it up into three movies!

P.S. - Just so ya know, I feed your fish every time I stop in!

Sara S. said...

I got goosebumps too. And yes I'm in to see it, and yes Peter is a bad, bad boy for breaking it up into three movies!

P.S. - Just so ya know, I feed your fish every time I stop in!

Peg said...

Now I've got the goosebumps. And a racing heart to go with it. Not sure if it was the singing, or the gigglefest I had with myself trying to do the split-finger hand thingy. (Interestingly [to me] my left hand does it effortlessly. My right hand can only do it if I force it into position with my left hand, leaving my left hand curled up into this fat-injected bird claw looking thing. Relax the left hand, and the right hand forgets its assigned position.) (I KNOW you wanted to know all that.)
Oh. I'm in. For the movie. Er, movieS. 'Cause my "movies I must see" list is not yet long enough ....

Andsetinn said...

The Hobbit will be good, I like the Tolkien world and I have the DVDs to prove it, the standard version and the extended version. I host 12 hour LOTR marathon every year (the 3 extended LOTR movies). But The Hobbit in 3 stinking parts. I was looking forward to 16 hour Hobbit/LOTR marathon. I'm not sure if I, or anyone, can do it for 21 hours.

Tia Chandler said...

Since I have no patience for sitting in darkened theaters, I will have to wait even LONGER for the DVD's. I read the Hobbit the FIRST time when I was about 10. I'm , 46, guess I can wait a little longer for the movie. The rest of my family can tell me how good it was when they go see it.

Three parts................seriously?

R. Mac Wheeler said...

Three much are tickets these days?

I'm glad I've already read the books.

I know how they end.

I can stay home.

(And read)

*I feed the fish too. Man they must crap a lot*

Linda Corbet said...

I'm so in!!!! Did you ever watch BBC's version of Being human? Guy who played Aidan is an elf! Woohoo but also bummed it will be three parts!

Carwoo said...

Sara and Mac, thanks for feeding the fish. I always forget and then they start getting agressive and...what was I saying?

Andsetinn, how can you sit through all 3 of TLOTRs and still be sane? I can't sit through an hour of Trueblood without picking up the living room or checking my droid to see what's going on on the net.

Tia, I know what you mean about waiting for the dvd's. That's what I did for the last of the LOTRs because I was seven months pregnant and there was no way in hell I was sitting there for three hours without going into premature labor or having a hissy fit or consuming all the popcorn in the theater. It would have been ugly.

Linda, I've been meaning to check out the UK version of Being Human. They say it's much better than the american's, which I have been watching and like. I imagine it's like Orlando Bloom as an elf. As Will Turner - meh. As Legolas, umhum. That's why I need those ears, right?

Anonymous said...

What is LOTR?

Anonymous said...

Hate to admit it but I!ve never read Tolkien but movie looks good. I!m a late bloomer to sci-fi but am loving it!

Carwoo said...

LOTR = Lord Of The Rings for non-nerds.